Buried in dead relatives

I'm only writing this because I vowed to make at least one entry per month, preferably one per week, and I made only one entry in December. This is partly because I was very depressed pretty much throughout the holidays. Heather, who knows of me from my rantings on the local newspaper's forum, stopped by and brought me a couple of quarts of a delicious gumbo, and a pair of slippers, and some cash. It was very nice. They've had a hard time themselves, lost their house.

My mother was also kind. She sent some of the deeds from my great-grandfather's estate and so I spent some time with Google Earth plotting his estate and it's divisions. The deeds mother sent documented 800 acres, and I think there was probably more.

I spent the holidays very homesick, for a time and a place that I not only fled time and again but that I literally gave up everything to get away from. Particularly those 20 acres and money enough for a house my father left me. It does seem to me people aren't really any different here, and things aren't really any better here. But then again, I'm not in jail.

I'm told my father was a gambler. Hell, his brothers found boxes of stubs from the race track. My mother said her sister saw him picking up stubbs in the parking lot. Now, why would he do that? He won a jackpot it seems, in a Mississippi casino. And when he died, even after spending considerably on a young woman and medical procedures for himself (I'm told) there was enough left to make sure I knew I could always come home.

That was the one thing he wanted me to know, that I could always come home.

I spent the holidays mulling over the past, something I've never my whole life long had time to do before.

When my mother lived at Blue Ridge Summit they learned that one of the famous past residents was Wallis Simpson. When someone on the local forum posted Obama's genealogy I came to learn Wallis (Bessie Warfield) was my 6th cousin 3 times removed. She married Edward VIII of England who abdicated in order to marry her.

So my mother sent me the book she had for many years now about Wallis, and it turns out that Wallis was friends with Benjamin Thaw who was cousin of Harry Thaw's mother. And Wallis lived with Harry Thaw's mother. Delphin Delmas, husband of my 4th cousin 4 times removed Pauline Hoge, sucessfully defended Harry Thaw for murder in the Trial of the Century.

My connection to Harry is that Benjamin married Consuelo Morgan who was sister of Gloria Morgan who married Reginald Vanderbilt (having daughter Gloria Vanderbilt). Reginald's brother Cornelius was the father of Grace Vanderbilt who married my 7th cousin twice removed Henry Gassaway Davis.

Gloria Vanderbilt, daughter of Reginald, married Howard Hughes, among others. Leo states on his Genealogics site:

Aged twenty-three her son Carter Cooper fell to his death, on 22 July 1988, before her eyes. He jumped from the 14th floor terrace of her New York City penthouse apartment. Gloria Vanderbilt later wrote about her son's death in her book _A Mother's Story,_ in which she expresses her belief that the suicide was caused by a psychotic episode induced by an allergy to the medical prescription drug _Proventil._ 'After Carter died, I really didn't think I was going to go on living and I did. And the way I did is, you do it moment to moment,' she said in a TV interview. 'I mean, there is never closure on anything like that'.

1.5 Million Maniacs Waiting To Explode

Well, the election's been over for a while now. I came in last with about 2,000 votes out of ten candidates, about 200 votes behind next-to-last. I had about 1,600 votes from the mail-in ballots, and was next to last, but lost ground when the precincts were counted.

All the charges against me have now been dismissed, so I accomplished my primary goal. I still have not got my property back. I've asked the public defender about it dozens of times. I have come to believe they have no intention of doing anything to help me get it back.

My name came up on a list for low-income housing. I don't believe they will accept me because of the marijuana, but I went through the motions and submitted the application Monday. It was due Tuesday.

Mother says she isn't doing well and it sounds like her husband is dying.

As for me, the past few weeks have been the first time in years - I can't remember how many years - that I haven't had something hanging over my head and worrying me to distraction.

I still can't believe I endured 3 years sleeping on the streets; three winters in this miserable mean place. Someone quipped in one of the forums, "Santa Cruz, it only looks cheap" and that is so true. It's been freezing cold the past couple of days, with the nearby mountains dusted with snow. I can see it from my window but I keep the curtains pulled and the blinds closed to keep the heat in. I don't know if it's because I'm in a corner room with two outside walls or what but my room has been COLD the past couple of days. So cold I've spent most of the time in bed because it's the only place I could stay warm.

While researching Prozac withdrawal and 'symptoms' I ran across a number of excellent videos on YouTube:

1.5 Million Maniacs Waiting to Explode


Paxil Addiction - "Discontinuation Syndrome"


My Paxil Withdrawal


Manipulating Doctors


Ex-Pharmaceutical Rep Speaks Out


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 1 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 2 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 3 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 4 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 5 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 6 of 7:


BBC: Seroxat taken on trust, part 7 of 7:

Catching Up.

One of the reasons I haven't posted for over a month is that shortly after the article about WAMMFest appeared in the local paper it was announced in the comments to the story that one of the people focused upon was a convicted child-molester, and she was in charge of childcare: Police: Sex offender at WAMMFest didn't commit a crime

I, of course, was devastated.

The fairly good article the Sentinel printed about WAMM appeared in 2 papers. The one above in 37.

Prior to this there was a bruhaha over lifting the smoking ban in the park. It didn't pass initially, as everyone expected. An objection was raised by the owner of the wine shop behind the museum, the same people that called the police on me with the result that I was arrested and had to get a friend to co-sign a bond and it costs me $110 which I can't afford to get out of jail.

It was a busy couple of months, what with running for city council and all.

I came in last. The good news is I got 1,992 votes. The next to lowest candidate got 2,077 votes. The next lowest was Lisa Molyneaux with 4,091. Since I doubt 1,895 people actually know who I am, I think I did pretty good. The lowest vote count to win a seat was 11,147. The highest number of votes for a candidate was 16,661. There were 10 candidates vying for 4 seats on the council; 37,905 registered voters and 33,018 ballots cast of which 12,922 were mail in ballots. My vote was 986 mail-in and 1006 at the polls.

I accomplished my major goal. Or thought I had. The marijuana charges were dismissed. But the battery charge was not dismissed today as I had expected. The prosecutor said it would be dismissed if the paperwork I presented was confirmed by the 'health department'. I believe the next court date is December 2. I expect they'll try me for murder. That's the kind of town Santa Cruz is.

Down to the seeds and stems

I must say the pace of my life has picked up dramatically over the past couple of weeks. I didn't get around to finishing this entry until well into October, even though it's dated September.

My care-giver, Pacific Coast Cooperative was raided. This was on the 18th, on Thursday. I had been there the previous Tuesday.

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And I never got around to finishing that post either and now it's November 19. It appears I managed to get through the entire month of October without making an entry. I made the news a number of times, and actually appear a few seconds in the video from WAMMFest that the Sentinel displayed on their front page for nearly a week.



I attended at least a half-a-dozen 'candidates forums', which were all pretty much panel discussions. There were 9 other candidates.

I saw Michael of Pacific Coast Cooperative at WAMMFest. He was out of jail, along with everyone else, he said. He was charged with sales I believe, but not conspiracy to distribute. I haven't heard anything more about that. I went by Greenway once and left nearly in tears when I saw their prices; $50 for an eigth of stuff that smelled like clover hay, i.e. it had been pollinated and was all but useless as medicine.

So I got on the internet and found I could save $200 by going to San Francisco, and so I have been spending the day on the train to San Francisco and back about once a month. In a way it is a blessing in disguise as it is good for me to get away and I don't mind the trainride.

The day after a candidate's forum which I can't remember right now, and the day of the County Democrats forum, it seems I was to be in court and didn't know it. Possibly the 24th of September. What I remember is that the day of the County Democrats forum I got a message from my lawyer saying I was supposed to be in court on marijuana charges but it was OK that I didn't show up as she was there and the charges were dropped.

I guess I should miss court dates more often?

I still haven't gotten my stuff back.

Well, I've accomplished my major goal, which was to post the WAMM video with me in the middle of it to my blog. I'll recap how things turned out in my next entry, which should be in November.

On the Run

I'm actually writing this post on the 11th. I started it on the 6th, and wrote one sentence, and put it aside to finish later. I intended to finish it the next day, or the next, and here we are.

I've been very busy. I've spoken at two candidate forums so far, and I've been buried in 100s of pages of reports, such as the Master Transportation Study, hoping to speak intelligently on the issues of interest to these different groups.

And filling out questionnaires. I spent a lot of time on the questionnaire for the Police and Fire, and spent about $20 because they required it to be sent on a CD and my CD drive doesn't work, and also a hard copy, and my printer doesn't work, and it has to be returned Certified Mail. So that all cost about $20. But I mailed it on the afternoon they required it to be delivered, on Friday, and they didn't get it till the following Monday. So they sent me a letter informing me I did not follow their instructions and will not therefore be allowed to participate in their candidate's forum.

I was rather disappointed by that, but not surprised. I had really wanted to address that particular group.

But I haven't gotten any help at all. The only person that's offered to help in any way, is willing to speak for me at these forums in exchange for the title of "campaign manager". That burns me up.

I'm supposed to bust my butt filling out these questionnaires, not to mention all the forms, so that someone else can speak for me at the forums?

I think I did OK at the last forum in-so-far as I don't think I embarrassed myself and did get off at least one or two good responses. I realized I failed to mention that I was facing two trials for possession of marijuana, though I did mention that there is no emergency or transitional housing for medical marijuana patients.

I feel like I held my own.

Before that forum, earlier in the day, there was a hearing regarding lifting the smoking ban at the park for WAMM's fundraiser. I wore my marijuana t-shirt and went down there. I signed up to speak, and then changed my mind and scratched my name off. And then someone requested the item be pulled from the agenda because they objected. So then I got up to speak.

As I saw it they were denying sick and disabled the use and the enjoyment of the park for one day a year, and I found that reprehensible to the point of obscenity. I think I projected that pretty well with my attitude, but I can see now I failed to vocalize one important point. It just seemed to me that stating the obvious, that these people were sick, and weak, and most likely in pain and mobility challenged, and some of them shut-in - that stating that would be a waste of the two minutes or so I had to speak. I felt they were all very aware of that. And I wanted to use the silence between my words to emphasize how reprehensible I thought it was.

I did say something like, "What this is about is denying sick and dying people the use of the park for one day a year, for five hours." I said that I think it's very sad that it's only one day, and that they have to go in to a tent to do it. And that's when I should have said something about the pain, and how hard it is to get around. But time was short and I felt I needed to make the point that medical marijuana patients need to get on with their lives, and I, for one, do not intend to sit in my room all day "watching Jerry Springer".

And best I can recall that pretty much covers what I said.

Well, one member was absent and the vote was split 3/3 so it was put over till the next meeting on the 23rd, 4 days before the event is scheduled to occur on the 27th. The absent member is certain to vote for lifting the smoking bann so the event won't be crippled. However, I think one of the "for" votes could turn against, though I don't think it's likely.

I got a notice from MediCal that since they are paying for my MediCare part B I no longer have a $0 monthly "share-of-cost" (premium) but that I can now afford to pay the first $537/month of my medical bills. The best I can figure, my only recourse is to get $40+ worth of insurance I don't need to reduce my 'income' to the point that my $537/month share of cost becomes $0. And the reason I have to get insurance I don't need is because if I get insurance for something I'm likely to need that insurance will exclude anything I'm likely to need it for, and so I will have to pay for it myself, and so I need to get insurance for something I don't need in order to get my share of cost to $0 so that MediCal will pay for it.

Is that clear?

There are two very important questionnaires I should submit by Friday, but instead I spent the day trying to straighten out my MediCal, with no luck so far. I have a doctor's appointed scheduled for the 3rd or 4th which I am going to have to cancel, it appears, as now I am going to have to pay for it myself, and I can't possibly afford it.

I called my public defender yesterday and left a message about our need to talk before we go to trail for my possession of concetrated cannabis on the 29th. I have received no response. I have some ideas about how I think the case should go, in fact I think there already should have been a trial for dismissal, but apparently the Santa Cruz district attorney thinks it's important to put a medical marijauna patient on trial for possession of marijuana.

I'm wondering if they are going to get by with it, and every media in town is going to ignore it.

Just another day in paradise

On the 11th & 12th I had court dates and I've tried to write about the results here several times. But every time it seems easier to bury myself entering data into my genealogy database or divert myself commenting on news items on the local newspaper's website. And, by the way, they aren't newspapers any more are they? What, exactly are they now? NewsSites?

On the 11th I appeared to be arraigned for possession of concentrated marijuana, i.e. hash. Code § H&S 11357(a), which was declared covered under Proposition 215 by the Attorney General in 2003. The incident where I was arrested, jailed, and held for bail is described in Bridge to Nowhere. The only thing that doesn't make this a slam-dunk dismissal is that I didn't have any documentation on me at the time. But Simms, one of the officers who arrested me on this last occasion was also one of the officers who cited me previously for possession of marijuana, and stole about an 1/8th an ounce from me, along with my pipe, in March, 5 months previous. And the fact is when I asked if they would go up to my room with me (overlooking the courtyard where I was arrested), Forbus responded that it would not be safe for them.

I was jailed and held on $1,000 bail and it cost me $110 to get out. And when I got home the maids had pulled the curtains and blinds open, and the window was raised wide, and I think some things blew out the window. I have my desk under the window. I think one of the things that was on my desk before I left the room and that blew out the window was the minute order with the scribble on it about getting a test for communicable diseases. I have spent hours going through my papers on two occassions looking for that minute order and can't find it. But I have all the others. I don't have a clear memory yet of that order being on the desk before I left my room that day, but I think it was.

I appeared to be arraigned on this most recent charge of possession of concentrated cannabis on July 21st and the D.A. asked for more time claiming the case was pending review, which the judge granted. I appeared again on August 11th and the same thing happened. This time the D.A. informed me before the judge entered the court room that this was what they were going to do, and they dealt with my case first which I perceived to be a courtesy.

However, I was angry because they don't have a case, no jury is ever going to convict me, and I believe it is just a ploy to avoid returning my medicine. The judge at first would not let me speak, but I did ask how long the D.A. could continue to call me in for arraignment and ask for more time to review the case and the judge responded the statute of limitations is 1 year. To which I replied "This constitutes harassment", got my paperwork and left.

There is no date to appear on any paperwork I have, nor have I been informed of one, so I am most curious how I am supposed to know when the D.A. has decided whether or not to do something about this. After a bench-warrant has been issued and I have been jailed for failure to appear?

The next day things went pretty much as I expected on the peeing charge. I was found guilty by commissioner Baskett, and I may appeal. I had requested a lawyer and a jury, and had been denied both. I did my best to present a necessity defense as I believe that it was a matter of necessity and the fact is I had to pee there and then and the only question was whether I peed in my pants and all over myself or not. And the reason I wasn't indoors and didn't have a toilet in the first place was that I was a medical marijuana patient.

I had disqualified Baskett numerous times previously on sleeping citations as I have been informed she has a track record of discriminating against the homeless. But during my window to disqualify her on this citation I was overwhelmed and depressed with all the charges, court dates, and pending trials to go through, and I figured they were going to get me for something or other no matter what I did and there was no point in disqualifying her yet again.

Whether I appeal or not I will have to pay the penalty, and I opted for community service over a fine of $80. So my fine is 11 hours community service and I am told it will cost me $35.

I've also been diagnosed as diabetic and when I saw the doctor for a follow up Wednesday I mentioned the deal and the test for communicable diseases.

In case you're lost at this point, previous to the above mentioned incidents I had been cited for battery (spitting) and possession of marijuana. That is all described in Hang Tight and Double Crossed?. The upshot of those charges is that after a hung jury on the first charge of battery I was offered a deal and strongly encouraged to accept it by my public defender. It was only after I accepted that I realized this would mean it would be a year before I got back the just less than an ounce they took from me Thanksgiving, and the 1/8th ounce they took from me in March, and the pipes, lighters, COFFEE CUP, and so forth that they have stolen from me on a public street in broad daylight.

While I haven't been able to find the minute order it was made clear to me that Emeline would not know what to do with a minute order with something scribbled on it about communicable diseases. And I was asked what communicable diseases, as it was pointed out to me that there are thousands. When I mentioned it was about spitting they rolled their eyes and said spit isn't a vector for transmission. Which is something I knew and had forgotten. The fact is I researched this years ago and there is voluminous documentation that saliva is not a transmission vector for disease, most of the research conducted over fears of spreading AIDS.

• San Francisco AIDS Foundation
• New York Times

And if you think about it, it makes sense as saliva is the first thing to come in contact with everything that goes into your body. It's function is to neutralize what you eat so that it won't harm you, and break it down.

And then there's the fact that it's nine months after the incident.

The nurse gave me his card and told me to have my lawyer call him, and I stopped by the Public Defender's office on the way home. The receptionist told me my case had been moved to a different attorney, but she wasn't in and so Sarah spoke with me, took the phone number of the nurse, and left a note for my new public defender to call me. She hasn't called yet but I probably shouldn't expect a call till the first of the week.

I'm to appear on the 29th with this new pubic defender, ostensibly to present the results of a test for communicable disease. Already made is a court date on the 9th of July 2009, the date on which I assume the charges were to be dismissed. At this point it seems clear to me that the only way I am to get my property back and clear myself is to either reject or violate the deal and demand a trial, for all three charges if necessary.

It also seems to me that this is harassment and that the law is being misused in order to abuse and intimidate me.